1. |
Diamond
02:04
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Up In the clouds
God’s looking down
Watching me cry
And watching me fall down
It’s alright I won’t give up the fight
The devil wants me to give up and die
Doesn’t want me to be alive
I’m saving too many people for Christ
No one understands
They say I’m a freak
They say I'm too meek
Even though I'm attacked everyday
No one’s got my back
I love God and I understand
That this is all part of his master plan
Putting me through pressure to create a diamond
Can't believe I'm surviving
After everything I’ve been through I can no longer be broken
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2. |
Hobbit
01:57
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All these ragged maggots
And fire breathing in dragons
Slacking and lacking
Confidence in themselves
Drinking Krakens and whacking
Dungeon trolls that keeps attacking
I’ve got no one backing me up
I feel like Bilbo Baggins
Sometimes I feel like I’m in a Tolkien novel
You can call me The Hobbit
I’ve got these problems and I can’t solve them
Nothing to prove
Nowhere to run
They’re throwing stones at me everyday
And my life is no fun
Throwing daggers and knives
They don’t know how to treat me nice
I hope that these words will suffice
They’re playing liars dice every time
They say I’m a fool
But They don’t know who
I am but they claim they do
They say I’m not cool
They keep on insulting me
They’re cursed not blessed
They keep talking their foolishness
The fact of the matter is I’m under so much stress
I feel like a damsel in distress
I need to get out of this chaotic mess
I understand this is a test
Of my faith. I feel so much unrest
There is more than meets the eye
The Lord knows that I tried to survive
The devil wants me to die
The devil is a lie
I've been through hell five million times
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3. |
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Plateauing on the summit
Of the mountain of hell
Walking through the darkness
I will not fail
I refuse to give up and throw in the towel
All of their hatred is trying to poison my soul
I’m sick of the insults
I'm sick of the lies
Treated with deference all of the time
Wickedness and evil
Is hurting my life
Years of abuse
And so much strife
Nowhere to run
I feel so trapped
I can’t turn back
And that’s a fact
It's OK
I had another bad day
No luck
And feeling so stuck
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4. |
Success Breeds Contempt
02:09
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They say succeeds breeds contempt
I agree 100%
My life is a testament
On how becoming successful can make people upset
Now I’m attacked everyday
Yelled at and blamed for everything
I can’t go back to San Jose
I’m trapped here with nothing to say
All of the people looking my way
Thinking i’m worthless and calling me lame
Claiming that I’m way too tame
And saying I should feel ashamed
My lack of luck has gotten me stuck
In this hole with nowhere to go.
In the pit of hell right now
I'm praying to God that he’ll get me out
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5. |
Deference
02:22
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I’m so left out
Sometimes I want to shout
Out loud but no one can hear
No one knows what I’m talking about
Filled with doubt, anger and fear
Wish you were here
I have no support
All the lies
I can’t cope
The laughter and mockery tried to stop me
Shattered my self esteem to smithereens
I’m on the side of the road
I forgot what I'm fighting for
Far from home and I’ve been disowned
Far from the shore
Treated with deference by everyone
Isolated and shunned
My life is no fun
It’s kinda sad when you see the truth
Of a situation and you know who’s who
Lied to for years
They said that I was meek
I used to stutter
I could hardly speak
Now that I’ve gotten some success
It makes those around me feel really anxious
They keep saying I’m a worthless loser and they're so stressed
They say I don't deserve it and they say I'm heartless
Out in the mud
In the blizzard
Can’t move on from this danger
Everyday they disturb my peace
I can’t concentrate and I can’t leave
I'm left out of the circle
I was so blind
I couldn't see
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6. |
Two Flat Tires
02:03
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Let me tell you about my life
I’m going through hell and it’s not alright
Wanted to make things work
Lord knows I’ve tried
I’ve been let down so many times
Two flat tires
I’ve got no spare
So much anger and so much fear
My past is coming back to haunt me
No help from friends or family
I'm out in the street under threat
They all hate that I’m not dead yet
Threatening my life and claiming I’m unsafe
Saying I’m worthless and calling me fake
I cried so many tears
I wept
I tried to be honest
The streets I swept
No one cared about me
Isolated from society
Treated with deference all of the time
For so many years I’ve been so blind
Life is far from sublime
I think about her all the time
Didn’t ask her out when I should have
I had to quit cause of the chaos
Forced to leave my job
I had no money and felt like a slob
They all said I’m a sloth
Cause I was out of work and I couldn’t shop
Anywhere that I want
Went through the motions like a robot
Pushing shopping carts and selling liquor
Frying French fries and living in fear
Trying to repair my life
I was just trying to do what’s right
All for nothing and no reward
I’m writing these songs and so devoid
Of love and emotions
I gave so much
To people who didn’t think I was good enough
They all told me to just give up
They all suggested that I should stop
Said I’m a failure
Called me a queer and said I’m a loser
I’ll keep fighting on
I'm giving it all to God
It’s been so long since I felt happiness
Im far from bliss
And I'm so pissed
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7. |
Separated Again
02:10
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This is the seventh song
On this album
Separated again
From all my friends
I’m suffering
Low self esteem
Some days I just wanna scream
All the lies
I was told
And now I’m 30 years old
Gaslighted and betrayed
Felt afraid
Made to feel like I was worthless
I had to pay the consequence
Standing on the fence
Hit by both sides
Things are so intense
Luckily I survived
I wish I could go back in time
And fix these things that are on my mind
So much regret
I’m so upset
Under so much stress like I'm a damsel in distress
I kept all of the pain inside
And told everyone I was fine
When I wasn’t all along
That’s why I had to write this song
I’m not OK
It’s safe to say
My life's getting worse everyday
I'm making albums to hide my pain
Trying to prove my worth for some reason
Abandoned and isolated
I’ve had enough
I’m desecrated
I’m not dead yet or decimated
And once I escape I’ll feel so elated
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Hacienda Gardeners Los Angeles, California
Hacienda Gardeners is an American indie rock band from Los Angeles, California
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