1. |
Reality Check
02:32
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For years I survived under disguise
Living life trying to hide out of their sight
They can't see all the pain I feel
They don't want me to be real
It's scary when the truth is revealed
It's easier to be fake and concealed
I've been in danger for years
So much fear
Spreading hatred and lies
They're insecure
Surrounded by people who are insincere
Living in chaos and crying endless tears
Wish I could leave but right now I'm stuck
I'm in a rut and all the doors are shut
They said I'm just not good enough
That I'll never amount to much
Suffering everyday to my dismay
Feels like I'm going insane
There's no escape
They threw it all away
There's nothing I can say
They keep on throwing shade
Their love's in vain
And I'm so afraid
Just want to get away
Wasted so many years
No one cared
Hated myself
I didn't want to look in the mirror
Couldn't go outside without being shunned and lied about
And life's no fun
I can't live my life without the pain and strife
It cuts me like a knife
It hurts me everytime
So depressed
I'm sick of being oppressed
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2. |
At My Expense
01:13
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Thank God I'm alive
I should've died so many times
I've been in so many fights
So many sleepless nights
Wasted years filled with so much fear
There's nothing I can do
It will not be renewed
And other times I lost my mind
Always coming in last
Kept dwelling on the past
But could I survive?
I just wanted to survive
In my life feels like I'm falling behind
It's sad you can't see people's true intent
You believe what they say at my expense
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3. |
Damage
03:40
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I walked away from her
I didn't say how I felt
Should've told her and now
I'm all alone
She'll never know how I feel
Why couldn't I just be real?
It's plain to see that there's no hope for me
She's out and about with other guys and now
I'm stuck inside just trying to survive
Stuck in the darkness
I can't see the light
Why didn't I tell her how I felt?
I'm kicking myself
I'm off the rails
No happiness and no freedom
She's gone forever and I've been living in hell
My enemy wants to destroy me
They gossip and lie out in society
While I am trapped in these four walls
No way to defend myself
That's why I'm writing these songs
I'm not too far gone although they say I am
That I'm washed out
Frankly I don't give a damn
People can see my side of the story
I'm not in the heat melting
I won't accept defeat
This oppression's been dragging me down
They claim I'm a clown while they remain on the ground
They slander me
They make up all their lies
I've gotta escape this fate
They just can't wait
They gossip about me in society
To all of my friends and family
It's sad to see
All their atrocities
They slander
They're toxic
'Cause they are so diseased
They can't remember
They don't know how I feel
They're so fake and so unreal
They can't deal with all the damage they've caused
Can't turn back
Tried but they can't press pause
It's a shame that I'm under attack
Won't take any flack and I'll push them back
They won't back down
They want me to fall
But I won't give up and I will stand tall
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4. |
Survival
07:06
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5. |
Live I
17:49
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6. |
Live II
08:23
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7. |
Live III
09:36
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Hacienda Gardeners Los Angeles, California
Hacienda Gardeners is an American indie rock band from Los Angeles, California
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